Why I’ll Never Tell A Mama Chiropractor She Needs To Work Harder

Let me start this off by saying, what I’m sharing with you here is my perspective after supporting other chiropractors in their practices for 9 years but intensely focusing on mama chiropractors for only one year.  I don’t have all of the answers, and I face many of the same challenges as you.  Keep that in mind as you read on.

Half a decade ago, I was building the practice I thought I was supposed to be building.  The practice that looked like what I had (unconsciously) come to believe a successful sports chiropractic practice “should” look like. 

Most weeks, I worked every day of the week either treating patients or working on growing the business.

Business was growing very quickly, even though I had no idea where I wanted it to grow to and I lacked any clarity or focus in my marketing.  I was doing everything and anything that seemed as though it may work. 

While things looked great on the surface of my life and business, I was leaving work each day, picking up my baby girl, driving home and most nights literally falling into bed utterly exhausted.  With my work clothes on, no less. 

I’d wake up each morning to start running the marathon all over again.  You know the story. 

How do I know you know?
Because I’ve been listening to you. 

Each and every day for the last twelve months, I’ve been listening to what’s really going on for you… behind the Facebook filter. 

You wake up each day, hustle to get yourself dressed, your kids dressed, everyone fed and out the door on time.  You either drop the kids off with family or bring them to the office with you, where you arrive just minutes before your first patient of the day.  Between patient appointments, you’re returning phone calls, answering emails, scrambling to create that social media post, writing SOAP notes and barely remembering to eat and drink. Your day goes by, repeating this process all. day. long.  Patients, notes, emails, Facebook, repeat. 

The day ends and you wonder where all the time went.  You look at a stack of chart notes waiting for you to sign off on them, but you feel so guilty leaving the kids at your parents’ house a minute longer than you have to.  So you dash out the door and hope to find time to get it all done later.  Maybe when the kids have gone to bed. 

In the very little quiet time you have, you think about all there is to do.  All the uncompleted tasks.  All the ideas you’d love to be implementing.  You already feel so overwhelmed and busy.  Yet when you turn to a podcast, a webinar, or a FB Live video, you hear:

You’ve gotta work hard to be successful
Expect to work around the clock for the first 7 years
Be obsessed
Hustle every day
Never stop

These messages soak in, having you believe that—yes, you should be working harder.  But as you wonder how you can work more, you feel sure it’ll require you to stay up later, wake up earlier, and leave no room for simply living. That’s when you start to ask yourself

“What the hell is wrong with me?  Why can’t I work harder?” 

Then… the self-doubt settles in.  And it’s really really hard to grow (anything) when you’re full of doubt that you even can.

This, love, is why I’ll never tell you to work harder.  You’re a mom, afterall.  I mean, really, how many moms do you know—working or stay-at-home—who AREN’T already working hard?  Like, really really hard actually.

Now, let me be perfectly clear.  There are times that working harder is necessary.  And I’m not at all suggesting that you should expect to earn the salary you want in the first year of your business by only working 10 hours a week.  If you figure out how to do that, you’ll be the next upcoming chiropractic business coach. 

While telling you that you need to work harder is easy and often an attempt at being motivating, this message is a disservice to you.  What you need isn’t to put in more hustle or to work longer hours. 

What you do need IS to have more clarity and more focus
on what’s really important and what’s really producing results. 

What you need IS to say no when you really need to and to ask for support wherever you can. 

What you need is to remember that, even on your worst days,
you’re actually doing really great. 

What you need is a safe place with other women who get it
—who get YOU—
because they’re on the same journey as you.